Do you feel exhausted, depleted and anxious? Are you trying to please others but forget about yourself and your own needs? May be you find yourself so focused on other people that you forget what is important to you. As this continues, you may experience resentment or burnout.
What is Codependency?
It is an unhealthy focus on other people’s problems and needs. Co-dependents are caring people who often lose their own self in relationships. Even though this becomes painful, they continue to ignore their needs and values.
Women are especially prone to think of others first, and tend to nurture and flex. However there are also men who feel more concerned about others than themselves. Many have the need to fix or change others, and find themselves enmeshed in the other person. They say: they love to help others however this is taken to an extreme.
Codependent relationships tend to have obsessive qualities. You feel compelled to be a certain way, to meet the high expectations of your partner, boss or family.
Individual counseling can help you overcome these challenge and learn new coping skills – especially if you find yourself repeating same issues in different relationships.
Why people find themselves in these situations?
Codependency develops in various family situations. Some have a family history of addictions or grew up as a child responsible for the needs of others.
Other factors could be overwhelming experience or overemphasis on caring or pleasing others. It has developed as a way to cope with a difficult situation.
Many co-dependents want to avoid bad things from happening or imagine the worst case scenario.
You may feel anxiety, self-criticism or guilt that if you change, others would not be able to continue. These are patterns have been reinforced through many years, and it gets carried into your relationships.
HOW CAN COUNSELING HELP ME?
- Recognize your own needs, wishes, and desires.
- Feel valued, understood and heard.
- Connect with yourself and find what would make you happy.
- Separate your own feelings from other people.
- Discover your values and goals separate from your family.
- Maintain healthy relationships with equal reciprocity.